How to be a Great Book Club Member
Book clubs are a wonderful way to connect with people and learn something new — but like any gathering of people, they can be difficult to sustain long term.
Members might start to skip meetings, show up late, or spend the whole night gossiping. Or it might be more insidious — a snide remark here, a side conversation there — that starts to make the group fray around the edges.
Nobody wants to be “that guy,” so as we have been thinking about the design of our own Mrs Blackwell’s Village Book Clubs we’ve assembled this list guidelines to ensure you will rise to the top of your fellow club members’ esteem.
Part manifesto for our own clubs, part best advice we found on the internet, here’s our guide to Being a Great Book Club Member.
Before you join:
Be honest with yourself about the commitment. If you’re uncertain whether you’ll be able to make it to most of the meetings or finish the books on time, now might not be the best time to join.
Understand the rules. Some book clubs are just a loose gathering while others have strict rules. Be sure you understand what you’re signing up for.
As a member:
Read the book. Sounds simple, but you might be surprised how many book club members don’t prioritise it. Some groups - like ours - will encourage you to still come along to meetings even if you haven’t finished the book but you might not enjoy the meetings quite as much.
Come prepared to discuss the book. Reading is only part one; you should also have a look at any discussion questions or prompts given ahead of time, and potentially even think up a few thoughtful or witty things to say ahead of time. Save time by marking passages or bringing notes.
Arrive on time. Don’t make your group wait for you to start the discussion, or interrupt the flow of conversation that started without you.
Give your attention to the speaker. Don’t answer text messages or read your emails while other people are talking and save any side chats for before or after the meeting.
Stay on topic. As much as possible, save your personal stories for before or after the meeting.
Be friendly. It’s entirely possible there will be someone in the group who isn’t your cup of tea. Do your best to take the high road. Don’t pick fights, be a bully, or leave people out.
Don’t invite others without permission. Be sure to ask before bringing new people into the fold.
Don’t trash the book. Even if you didn’t like it, try to be thoughtful and intelligent with your criticism.
Don’t complain about the book selection. Most groups have a set way of selecting books and that means that you may not love every title. Consider it a learning experience.
Let everyone speak. You might be the world’s greatest expert on the topic at hand, but try not to dominate the conversation. Bonus points if you ask a question of someone else.
Attend every meeting. Of course, now and then things happen to all of us, but try your best not to skip meetings. Chances are there’s someone else in the group who is really looking forward to seeing you.
Be a good host. If it’s your turn to host, have the space ready on time and be prepared to lead the discussion.
Volunteer. If your group takes turns hosting, providing food, leading the discussion, etc., be sure you step up and volunteer when it’s your turn.
Have titles to recommend. If your club solicits reading selections from members, come prepared when it’s your turn.
Choose your selection carefully. If it’s your turn to pick the next book, keep a few things in mind: the audience (your group), length, cost, and availability.
Leave on time. Try not to stay past your welcome. Your host likely wants to clean up and get to bed!
If you do your part to be an excellent book club member, it’s more likely that your club will thrive. And if your good example isn’t enough to sway other members of your club, you could anonymously forward this article…
